Lissa Oldcorn (Michala's cousin), Bradford.
I am Michala's cousin, and have tried several times over the last weeks to put down in words what emotions and memories have been pouring through me since the passing of Michala and Sam.
Family photos have been sifted through and many hours have been spent sharing memories of Michala in particular but also of Sam. These hours have been filled with anguish as to why such great, young, energetic people are taken so suddenly and brutally from us, but also with laughter at a wealth of great memories that they both provided us with.
Michala and I were born seven months apart, Michala in May and me the following December. We are quite a small, close family, so all of the important occasions in our early lives were celebrated by the whole family. Be it Christenings, Birthdays, First Holy Communions or whatever, the family would come together. Particularly memorable are the seemingly unending sequence of birthday parties. With me and my sister Heidi, and Michala, Danielle and Becky, there always seemed to be a party around the corner. They always were the same, and I am unable to differentiate between them.
I have smiled a lot recently when people have been speaking of Michala's strong sense of justice and making sure that "the right thing" is done. This virtue must have been a late development, because as a child my overriding memory of Michala is knowing that if she came to our house my mum or Aunty Jeannette would have to check Michala's bag for stolen goods. And there was always at least one in her bag! It was not just toys that she took, she would attempt to take anything. She even took soap from the toilets at the Estonian club.
As we grew into adulthood, my actual contact with Michala became less often. We went to the same secondary school, and like Danielle and Becky have mentioned she was a hard act to follow, both in academic terms, and in terms of how people perceived her. She was well liked and admired by all who knew her. I got my GCSE and A level results the year after Michala on both occasions, and although I did well, I could not match Michala.
As her path took her first to Oxford, then on to Bristol via London, I saw Michala maybe four or five times a year. On each occasion the conversation was easy and we took a keen interest in each others personal and career developments.
Michala never forgot the birthdays of our sons Isaac and Oskar. This was easy with Isaac, as he shares May 2nd as his birthday with Michala. She renamed him her "Birthday Twin"! We would always recognise the Bristol post mark and know that Michala and Sam were thinking of the boys at this time. And it was not just signing a card. There was always a mini essay that filled the card, that showed that she was truly thinking of us.
That leads me on to Sam. Like so many people on this blog have mentioned, he could get along with anyone. This was down mainly to him making the effort to connect with people in whatever way he could. He took the time to find out people's interests and then used his encyclopaedic knowledge of everything to engage with them.
Between them they had a wicked sense of humour. The most vivid memory of my wedding day is seeing Michala desperately trying to dress Sam as he was keen to add Bradford City's Valley Parade ground to his list of venues for nakedness. Also, when Oskar was a year old, he received a gift of a bear dressed as a rugby player. Knowing that my husband Christian is an avid Rugby League follower, and he didn't care at all for Rugby Union ( the game played by southern, G&T drinking toffs!) , the bear came with the name Lawrence ( as in Dallaglio, an aforementioned Southern G&T drinking toff and then England captain). Obviously, the bear was unofficially renamed Lesley, but has recently had to be changed again!! Sam was very perceptive, sometimes scarily so, as his rendition of "who let the dogs out" aimed at Christian's family at our wedding illustrated. Sadly I will never be able to get the whole truth from Sam as to how he managed to get a fully guided tour of the Stadium from the security man at our wedding reception, but we are still very impressed that he managed to do so.
As with many people, the last time I saw Michala and Sam was on their wedding day. Having exchanged emails with her in the run up I know how excited she was to be marrying Sam and it is obvious from the day itself how happy they were together.
I am still left in disbelief when I think that I will never see them again, but I also feel very proud and privileged to have known them at all.
Pic 10 is from Heidi's first Holy Communion and shows ( Lto R) Heidi Myself Michala and Danielle.
Pic 24 shows (L-R) Michala, Danielle, Becky, Heidi and me.
No comments:
Post a Comment